Why Marriage Takes Work
To achieve anything worthwhile takes work. Why should marriage and money be any different? Years of your life are spent in school preparing to obtain the job you want or the career you want to pursue. If you wanted to excel in sports, art or singing, you were willing to work at it and spend endless hours practicing. Remember PRACTICE makes PERFECT. It wasn’t work – it was a joy. I even teach our twins that… practice makes perfect. You will not just know how to automatically do a certain thing… you must perfect the craft.
Whatever your dream, nothing would stop you from tirelessly working to achieve your goal even if it meant foregoing certain pleasures and taking extra classes. You studied and read every book you could find to help you get better and eventually become the person you wanted to be.
Marriage and money management should be approached with as much zeal. The wedding is approached with much excitement that some can’t even sleep at night. Unfortunately, most people who try their hand at marriage think it’s a project that is DIY or OJT (on the job training). They “wing it” on a day-to-day basis and fail to see the mistakes made along the way until it ends in separation or divorce. It’s no secret that more than half of all marriages end in divorce often because of money and many others are miserably unhappy.
Marriage is not taken seriously anymore or at least not for long. As soon as the passion and dedication of the wedding vows fade into the bliss of the honeymoon, couples say well if it doesn’t work out it’s no big deal to go our separate ways.
If children are involved this is certainly not so, but divorce can also have more far reaching effects on others as well. This includes not only your immediate family but friends as well on both sides of the marriage.
With marriage and money comes responsibility and accountability. Couples would do well to repeat their wedding vows occasionally, especially the part that says FOR RICHER or FOR POORER. So often when a marriage gets tough with a loss of job, poor health or unexpected expenses, money troubles start and the stress begins to build and you look for a way out. Marriage has become too much about what you can do for me, rather than what WE can do for each other, what do WE want for our marriage and what do WE want OUR Marriage LEGACY to be!
Divorces are too easy to come by. More work should have gone into the engagement period which most times are all too brief. The longer the engagement the more you can learn about your partner.
If there are little things (or big things) that annoy you it’s better to discover them before the vows are said. Going into marriage thinking you can change someone most of the time is a fairy tale.
Just like you prepare for a career, you should prepare for marriage. Premarital financial counseling could be extremely beneficial. It enables couples to discover what money means to each other, what is important to each and formulate mutual financial goals AS well as a FINANCIAL plan for their marriage. They formulate a plan on various areas dealing with money from establishing a foundation to planning for home ownership, parenting or even continuing their education. In a counseling situation most feel more comfortable sharing their feelings with a professional present.
Enter into the sanctity of marriage knowing that it’s a lifetime commitment. Together you can accomplish so much more than alone. It will take work and self sacrifice. The marriage highway is filled with bumps and potholes but it’s a trip worth taking and may be the best journey of your life.
Other posts you may want to view:
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What an awesome time I’ve been having during Bride and Groom Money Talk FAQ Virtual Book tour. Today, January 26th was kicked off with my show – Bride and Groom Money Talk Radio discussing premarital financial counseling topics such as Money and Marriage Lessons from the POTUS State of the Union Address which you’ve already [...]Read more